By Julie Burton Anchor: Authorities were called when things got out of hand concerning the legality of enrolling a boy named…named…he doesn’t have one because the parents say it’s no one’s business? Am I reading this right? And he’s five? Oh *censored*, we’re live. Cut. We’re live outside Washington Elementary where a couple was refused the […]
MockMom
Research Concludes Mothers Use Full Names When Kids Are Jerks
By Jacqueline Miller of boogersabroad.com In a paper released this morning, researchers at the University of Notre Dame concluded mothers’ natural child-rearing instincts necessitate they use their children’s full, entire names to correct asshole behavior. “We did hundreds of case studies with mothers and children from different parts of the country, with varying backgrounds and socioeconomic statuses,” […]
Trump Says He’ll Seek Re-Election. Here Are Some Sequels We’d Rather See Than a Second Trump Term
By MockMom Contributors Since he’s a quintessential narcissist, it’s no surprise that Donald Trump has announced he’ll seek re-election. And, aside from a few die-hard Fox News enthusiasts, the world is groaning in unison, “AW, HELL NO!” We don’t want four more years of Trump. We’d rather have a pulsating cold sore pop up the day […]
Mom Stops Posting Pictures on Facebook and Ceases to Exist
By Stacy Stevenson of momlikeaboss A once physically tangible mom-of-two in Oklahoma recently ceased to exist after discontinuing the use of her social media feeds as a mechanism for establishing her children’s personal brands. “It was taking up so much of my time and I love them, they are wonderful, beautiful kids, but I was just done,” […]
Leashed Toddler Can Jump up, Roll Over
By Jacqueline Miller of boogersabroad.com Milwaukee mother Rebecca Simmons uses a safety harness to help control her spirited 2-year-old toddler, Connor, in crowded areas like the zoo, airports, and shopping centers. “Even in a stroller, he’ll just unbuckle himself and take off in the opposite direction,” Simmons explained during a recent outing to Southridge Mall. “This is […]
Woman Shamed As ‘Bad Mom’ For Not Putting Smiley Face on Child’s Pancake
By Aimee Stotts of mytwocentsandmore.com A Dallas mom is said to have served her three-year-old son a normal, plain pancake. “It looked like a pancake I would eat,” said a neighbor, aghast. “Just a plain, faceless thing. No blueberries made into a smile, and what’s worse, the poor child didn’t even say anything about it and ate […]
Mom in Target Super Psyched to be Making Small Talk Right Now
By Candace of The Mom at Law When Jessica Brown visited her local Target Monday morning, she wanted nothing more than to engage in small talk. Or, at least that’s what the no less than two dozen people must have thought when they stopped to chat her up on everything from the changing weather to the […]
An Important Message from Pistol Pete, Your Kid’s New School Mascot
By Leslie Gaar of pailsandfires.com Hi, kids! I’m Pistol Pete, the new mascot here at Sunnyside Elementary. I may look like a scary semi-automatic weapon, but don’t worry, I’m here to keep you safe and sound! Sure, it feels strange seeing a gun in your school—that used to be a no-no! But we’ll be seeing a […]