By Andrew Knott of Explorations of Ambiguity Hello, ladies. Wonderful day today, isn’t it? The weather is almost as beautiful as your lovely faces. And you know what else is beautiful? The fact that I just had a baby girl yesterday. Well, my wife did, but I was there, too. Let me tell you, having a baby…

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By Anna Gracia of TheSnarkyReviewer.com “I’m sorry to hear your child won’t eat his vegetables. Have you tried putting them into a smoothie yet?” “You’ve tried roasting, steaming, baking, and turning every imaginable vegetable into a fry. You’ve even succumb to topping them with copious amounts of melted cheese like you remember seeing in ’90s Velveeta…

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By Andrew Knott of Explorations of Ambiguity Hi, I’m a stay-at-home dad in a TV show or movie, and the thing I think about most is doing sex. Specifically, I’m worried that my wife doesn’t want to do sex with me anymore because instead of expressing my manliness by driving hard bargains and winning bread, I change…

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By Julie Burton of Bug Bytes I have a rage. I do, I’ll admit it. I would call the Devil himself to sit down with me to bargain how we can make Kansas State win a National Title, the Kansas City Chiefs win the Super Bowl and the Kansas City Royals win the World Ser –…

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By Marlene Kern Fischer of Thoughts From Aisle Four A conference of forensic doctors from around the world, which convened in Munich, Germany, has concluded that guns actually do kill people. The conclusion was reached unanimously after only ten minutes of analysis and discussion. One doctor from Sweden said she did not understand Americans who persisted in…

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By Lola Lolita Greenville mom, Eve Obvio, always knew that her husband’s decision to leave his hatchet haphazardly laying on the shed floor, even though she asked him 4.7 trillion times to please put it away when he was done chopping wood (not that kind of wood; like, literal wood for the fireplace) so the…

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By Melissa Avstreih The chairwoman of the Republican National Committee, Ronna McDaniel, blasted former first lady Michelle Obama on Thursday for her suggestion that Republicans are essentially “all men, all white.” Speaking to the Pennsylvania Conference for Women, the former first lady alleged that congressional Republicans are primarily white men. “What you can see is this…

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By Michelle Poston Combs of Rubber Shoes In Hell After gaining nearly a billion followers, Jesus Christ announced the deletion of His verified Twitter account that He created soon after His return to earth 4 months ago. He created His Twitter account after becoming disillusioned with Facebook and Instagram. “When I joined Twitter, My biggest worry was…

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By S.E. White Eating at a popular local restaurant, a millennial-aged mom named Sarah said, “Forget the mortgage, that avocado toast looks amazing.” Sitting with her husband and three children, she was well aware of taking a risk going out to support the food service industry at all. After all, millennials are rumored to be the…

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