Other considerations for countertop placement included the empty juice container from the fridge and the empty cracker box in the pantry.
MockMom
Infertile Couple Told to Relax, Finally Able to Conceive
To the casual observer, Lonnie and Laura Barron looked like they had everything: a loving relationship, a beautiful home, lucrative jobs, the freedom and expendable income to go on vacation without having to buy the “family package.” But the thing they wanted most was a child to share their […]
Local Mother Attacked for Taking Hatless Baby Outdoors
A local mother was attacked by a group of senior citizens for taking her 6-month-old daughter to the grocery store without a hat. According to the police report, the victim, Paula (who asked that her last name be withheld) ran out of diapers on Wednesday and drove to her […]
New Mom Can’t Find Word To Describe Emotions on Wheel Of Feelings
Cleveland, Ohio — Since Brie Jennings, 34, gave birth to her daughter six months ago, it has been a daily struggle to find one word to encapsulate her feelings. “Each moment has been filled with elation, then fear, then frustration, followed by overwhelming loneliness, then a kind of dreadful […]
Trendspotting! Dad Bods Hot, Mom Bods Still Gross
From Contouring to Delayed Vaccination Schedules, here’s a look at what’s hot and what’s not this week: IN: Dad bods. Chubby is still chic for dads. Who needs a six-pack on a man when you can have the whole keg? Amirite, ladies? OUT: Mom bods. Yuck. Unless moms show […]
Mom Reaches Count of Three, Has No Idea What to Do Next
ST. LOUIS– In a move that captured the attention of the entire playground, local mom Stephanie Lancaster reached the count of three. “He’s usually so good, but we skipped his nap today,” Lancaster tearfully justified of her son who wouldn’t allow other kids down the slide without knowing the password. […]
Local Introvert Can’t Wait for Playdate to Be Over Already
Local introvert Heidi Wells, having already spent a considerable amout of time quietly checking her phone, is reportedly “so fucking ready” for a playdate for her 3-year-old son to be over. The invitation for the playdate came after Wells made the mistake of engaging in eye contact with another […]
I Tried KonMari and Threw Away My Family
Letting go of clutter is not hard to do. It’s determining what is really clutter that’s the difficult part. I mean, of course that piece of paper with five scribbles on it that you’ve kept under the guise that one day you’ll put it in your child’s memory book as […]