By Samantha Wassel of Between the Monkey Bars
Get your Easter baskets ready, people, because you’re going to want to fill them when you hear about the latest flavor line of Peeps, set to hit shelves later this month.
And you’re definitely going to want to keep these babies in your own baskets and out of your kids’. BOOZY PEEPS ARE NOW A THING. Like, a real thing, as in you will need to show your ID to purchase these badass motherfuckers.
Yesterday, Just Born, the company behind the iconic Easter candy, announced that it will be releasing a limited-edition alcoholic line of its popular sugarcoated marshmallows. That’s right: the candy will be made with actual alcohol.
Sounds like those cloyingly sweet, blobby chicks that everyone loves to hate are about to get a little bit sweeter. Or at least more tolerable. I mean, if you’re going to puke from indulging in too many of the gaggingly saccharine things, you might as well be drunk while you do it, amirite?
Boozy Peeps will be available in three inebriating flavors for your “responsible” (yeah, okay) adult enjoyment: “Margarita” (a neon green marshmallow coated with salt instead of the traditional Peeps sugar), “Hops” (a dark beer-infused, bunny-shaped version), and “Wine” (a deep red chick soaked in sweet ruby port wine).
Let me just reiterate that last one for a second: WINE SOAKED PEEPS. I mean, OMG guys, it’s literally a dessert wine. Or maybe a wine dessert? Whatever you want to call the things, this chick is SO here for it.
I’m literally drooling. Then again, I’ve already had three glasses of non-marshmallowfied wine, so maybe I’m just day drunk.
(Disclaimer: In case it isn’t obvious, booze-infused Peeps only exist in our fantasies. Please don’t @ us.)
About the Author
Samantha Wassel is an Army Wife and SAHM to three energetic boys and three lazy AF cats. She enjoys running, writing, kettle-belling, reading, nerding out, and eating exorbitant amounts of goat cheese and Peanut Butter Halo Top ice cream (but not together, because barf). You can find more of her work at Between the Monkey Bars.