By Lisa Carmody Doiron of Momologues After 43 years of holding it in, Gwyneth Paltrow finally pooped. “I don’t like to call it ‘pooping,’” stated Paltrow. “I prefer something gentler, like ‘conscious unstooling.’” [adsanity id=”35664″ align=”aligncenter”/] “I used to think conscious unstooling was just for regular people and assholes…you know, those […]
By Elizabeth Argyropoulos of Bourgeois Alien Rainn Nikolaev of Austin, Texas sits comfortably in her green-built, Frank Lloyd Wright-inspired home, surrounded by her five children, ages 4-18, all in various stages of breastfeeding. Her oldest son, Rue (named after the family ancestral home in Ruse, Bulgaria) is preparing to attend college in […]
By Rhiannon Giles of rhiyaya.com Hi there. You may remember me as Emma from Friends, daughter of Ross and Rachel. Way before people broadcast the birth of their children on Facebook or Snapchat, you gathered in your living room to watch me come into the world. Oh no, she did not […]
By Elizabeth Argyropoulos of Bourgeois Alien It’s that time of year again: Finn’s Birthday Saturnalia. For those of you who asked for the recipe for my hummus birthday cake from last year, it’s included at the end. In lieu of presents, we request you memorize a Gaelic folk song and perform the […]
By Rhiannon Giles of rhiyaya.com Durham, NC – Local mother and yoga enthusiast Ruby Grace was escorted out of a weekend Trump rally after the gun she was carrying was revealed to be a yoga mat. Authorities were alerted by Sharon Stiles, who says her aunt participates in yoga. “I knew […]
By Kristina Johnson of thatmommylady.com President Obama addressed the nation from the Oval Office on Tuesday in an attempt to calm the country’s rising panic over Justin Bieber’s departure from Instagram. “My administration is focusing all available resources on bringing Justin’s Insta back. We have the FBI, CIA, DoD, and MTV […]
By Elizabeth Argyropoulos of Bourgeois Alien What to expect from your adorable little Trump supporter during the first 1-6 months! Time supporting Trump: 1 Month Achieved skills (most Trump supporters can do) Lifts head, but only out of spite Responds to sounds, particularly to Lee Greenwood’s “Proud to be an American” Poops […]
By Crystal Lowery of Creepy Ginger Kid NORWICH, UK — A local woman posted two makeup-free/natural hair selfies this morning to raise awareness for ginger acceptance. Crystal Lowery, from Mulbarton, says society pressures red-haired people to fit into its skin tone norms. “Social media is rampant with expensive skincare products advertising […]