When local mother Jane Forman brought her preschooler, Duncan, to the pediatrician’s office for his annual checkup, she expected the usual questions about his diet, sleep, letter identification, and activity levels. She had even braced herself for Duncan’s refusal to sit still during the examination and his high-pitched, irrational […]
Author: Mock Mom
Fed-Up Teacher Throws Fidget Spinner Like a Godd**n Ninja Star
By Kristine Laco of Mum Revised The recent craze of students using fidget spinners in classrooms has caused a general uproar among teachers in a Colorado community. “I don’t feel the children are listening to me anymore when the spinners are around,” Ms. Sidearm told this reporter from County lockup. “The […]
Dear Mom, Bedtime Sucks
By Barrie Bismark of The Daily Dump Dear Mom, We need to talk because there is something that has been bothering me for quite a while now. Believe it or not, I am three years old and clearly wise WAY beyond my years. So, here it goes: This going to bed […]
‘Worst Mom of the Year’ Acceptance Speech
By Katie Mac Stevens of www.fromnorth2south.com The votes had been counted, the name written on the card, and the envelope had been sealed and given to the announcer. The room went silent as he made his way to the stage to announce the night’s big winner for Worst Mom of the […]
Trump’s Personal Lawyer’s New Lawyer Hires Lawyer
By Joanna McClanahan of Ramblin’ Mama Michael Cohen, Trump’s personal attorney, hired an attorney earlier this week to represent him in the ongoing investigations into Russian meddling in the 2016 election. Then, just today, Cohen’s new attorney, Stephen Ryan, decided it might also be a good idea to lawyer-up. Stephen […]
Doctors Identify New Syndrome Affecting Teenagers
By Kristine Laco of Mum Revised Daphne, a 15-year-old girl in 10th grade, was recently diagnosed with torn oblique muscles and a chronic twitch that appears to not be related to any nervous system condition, such as Tourette’s Syndrome. The source of this condition can only be described as ‘ducking violently and […]
Scientists Confirm Men Missing Gene to See Things Right in Front of Their Eyes
By Shya Gibbons of Vintage Dreams With A Modern Twist With nicknames to keep their identities secret, the following women have finally completed work that will explain the inexplicable: Why do men have blinders on when it comes to objects at home? The team had the following top agents working […]
New Evidence Suggests Jesus May Return as a Mother
By Kristine Laco of Mum Revised In a startling turn, the Vatican is reconsidering their widely-held views. Their scholars have been poring over documents and testimony from mothers everywhere, as a reinterpretation of the Bible proves enlightening. “We do not deny that maybe the Bible was misinterpreted,” Cardinal Pat whispered. […]