Humor Parenting SPM/MM Tweets

12 Funny and Relatable Tweets About Mall Santa

Christmas is a time of many traditions. Things that make this time of year extra magical and special. There are few points in the year that are more ripe with symbolism and tradition than Christmas. One of these traditions is the annual load-up to go visit the big guy himself, Mall Santa.

Mall Santa is just like the real thing, except far more jaded. Mall Santa has inspired movies and red suit sales everywhere with his enthusiastic rendition of the real one, the one who’s too busy making toys up North to sit in a giant chair outside the Iowa Bed Bath and Beyond listening to how all these damn kids just want Call of Duty and AirPods for Christmas.

At the end of the day, Mall Santa might just be a guy in a suit with a job, but he is such a huge part of the Christmas tradition and magic. This is evident in the beaming smile from older kids when they see him, and by the abject terror he inspires in babies. Seriously, that photo you just paid for is going to provide LOLs for years to come!

1. We waited for an hour and 45 mins; Mama’s gonna need to see some teeth

2. Oh snap

3. They really see the worst of the worst

4. Mall Santa saw you poop in Daddy’s shoes

5. Actually, here’s a whole list of things you can scare my kids into complying with

6. Fun fact – Mall Santa isn’t just for kids

7.  Plot twist

8. *Just pretend so you get more presents ok?*

9. Looks like thievery will get you one more lump of coal

10. It’s the gift that will stay with them forever

11. You are all of us

12. Santa just really wants you to live laugh love your way onto the nice list, ok?

Mall Santa is essential to the Christmas tradition.

After all, who else can you fake call all through November and December to get your kids to brush their damn teeth??