My son will be three next month and he still uses a pacifier at night. He calls it his bink. I’d like to tell you that I don’t really care what anyone thinks about my son using a pacifier as a nearly three-year-old, but that’s not entirely true. The truth […]
Author: Jorrie Varney
Target Introduces $5 Wine And We’re Already Obsessed
Every time I go to Target my cart runneth over with material happiness. Throw pillows, strappy sandals, wall décor, OH MY! I can’t help it; I have mad love for the big red bullseye and their modestly-priced merchandise. Target has become the one-stop shop for mothers like me who […]
We Now Know The Age You’re “Too Old” For The Bar Scene
I remember standing in a crowded bar with my girlfriends, each of us dressed to the nines. We’d spent the early evening hours drinking wine, gossiping, and polishing our nails in preparation for a night at the club. I can still smell that hazy bar smell—a mixture of stale smoke […]
Zap Zap Kindergarten Math App Is My New Favorite Thing
This post is sponsored by Zap Zap Kindergarten Math Earlier today I was in desperate need of a shower. My hair was in a greasy perma-tail, and I smelled like burned cinnamon rolls and dirty laundry. Unfortunately, as the mother of a three-year-old and a 5-year-old, I can’t just go […]
Micro-Generation Born Between 1977-1983 Given New Name
As someone born in the early 1980s, I have never really identified with Generation X or The Millennials. I didn’t grow up in the time of technology like a Millennial, but was still young enough to easily adapt when the revolution hit. I spent hours of my youth on the […]
New Program, Prime Wardrobe, Proves Why Everyone Loves Amazon
Thanks to the internet, people have been shopping from their sofas for years. God bless you, internet. There is nothing better than shopping for new gear without being required to interact with other humans. No fuss, no muss, no pants needed. Just a few clicks and BAM—pants on your porch. […]
Text Program Helps Kids In Need Find Free Meals This Summer
Summer is upon us and the kids are out of school. Can I get a HALLELUJAH!? While many of us are more than happy to trade homework for lazy days in the sun, there are some kids who will miss the consistency and structure of the classroom, or even the […]
Women Are Putting Wasp Nests In Their Vaginas And Shockingly, This Is A Bad Idea
This just in: it has been confirmed by a doctor that it’s dangerous to put a wasp nest in your vagina. In related news, don’t put broken shards of glass, porcupine quills, or jagged scraps of metal in there either. Gynecologist Jen Gunter is warning women against trying the latest WTF […]