By MockMom Contributors Set up additional emergency funding to the fire department to help put out this incoming dumpster fire. Replace nuclear button with Staples big, red “EASY” button. Put post-its up to help Trump learn governmental vocabulary, like “legislate” and “veto.” Leave a children’s version of the Constitution on […]
Search Results for "rhiannon giles"
When Self-Care Is a “Relaxing” Bath Next to a Bowl Full of Pee
Give a burned-out mother five minutes and a Google search bar and she’ll be told no fewer than a dozen times that she needs to practice some self-care. Self-care is seen as this magical cure-all for anxiety, stress, and all that bothers you in life. I’m pretty sure it cures […]
Happy F**king Holidays from the McSmiths
Happy All-Inclusive Holidays! Can you believe the year is almost over? It’s been an excitement-filled year for all of us! We started the year off right by taking a fun little anniversary vacation on a luxury cruise to Bora Bora. We really do like to be frugal, so we […]
Practical Advice for Surviving Hospital Bed Rest
By Rhiannon Giles Hospital bed rest is not the worst that can happen — in fact, it exists to prevent the literal worst that can happen. But at the time? At the time it feels pretty fucking terrible. Imagine being a human pin cushion with a headache and a catheter. […]
Ghosts of Strom Thurmond and Jesse Helms Seen Leaving Trump Tower
By Rhiannon Giles of rhiyaya.com Having already worked through the roster of vile, old, white men currently living in this country, anonymous sources reported seeing the ghosts of both Strom Thurmond and Jesse Helms leaving President-elect Donald Trump’s Manhattan apartment on Sunday. Trump, speaking through his official Twitter account, added fuel […]
An Open Letter to Preeclampsia
By Rhiannon Giles of rhiyaya.com Dear Preeclampsia, You have been the friend every woman longs for during the exhausting final months of pregnancy. Your thoughtfulness was extraordinary — you saw clearly my need for rest and relaxation during such a stressful time. Sure, I would have preferred a nice hotel and […]
PSA: This Year a ‘Debate Drinking Game’ Could Kill You
By Rhiannon Giles of rhiyaya.com By the morning of the first presidential debate of 2016, social media was abuzz with ways to spice up the event. A deeply held tradition in some areas, a Debate Drinking Game (DDG) is a social activity for people who want to make the debates into […]
Dear Mom Who Is Totally Screwing Up
By Rhiannon Giles of rhiyaya.com Dear mom who is totally screwing up, Today my five-year-old daughter screamed the whole way home because I would not buy her a pottery wheel. Today I lost my patience. I will lose my patience again tomorrow. I sometimes clean up her messes because I can’t […]