Hurricane Florence is set to a make landfall and slam into the Carolinas by the end of this week. According to the National Weather Service in Wilmington, North Carolina, “This will likely be the storm of a lifetime for portions of the Carolina coast.” Catastrophic flooding and destructive winds are expected.
Over a million people have been told to evacuate, and they have no idea what they will come home to. It’s a terrifying time for everyone affected. While we in no way want to minimize the severity of the situation, sometimes a little levity can go a long way in boosting spirits during a difficult time. So here you go.
A weather map showing the trajectory of Hurricane Florence was posted on the National Hurricane Tracker Facebook page and it unwittingly unleashed a storm of hilarious NSFW comments. Over 34,000 in fact. Why? Because the graphic has a striking similarity to a giant penis poised to plunge into North and South Carolina and Virginia. Look out, all you southern belles and gents, a big ol’ schlong is a’ coming.
According to the page’s administrator, the graphic was completely unintentional.
But that didn’t stop the commenters from coming out in droves to poke a little fun.
So pull up a chair, sit back, and indulge your inner 12-year-old boy with the following Winners of the Internet.
Although, as one commenter points out, based on another corresponding map, Virginia appears to be ready for it…
Ready or not, it would seem there’s no backing out now…
What about size? Does it really matter?
And please, for the sake of all your mothers, don’t forget about the consequences:
The National Hurricane Tracker did attempt to deflate the situation by posting a second map in which they appear to have erased the ridges and attempted to make it look a bit less phallic-y. They failed.
They also felt the need to explain their apparent inability to edit the map enough to stop our eyes from seeing the giant PENIS (It’s too late. We can’t unsee what we all know is there.) Clearly we all need to get our minds out of the gutter. It’s not about the graphic people. They are, after all, “just trying to convey the wind threat.”
In all seriousness, you guys, be safe out there. Our thoughts are with all of you who are waiting out the storm. Here’s hoping it just comes in as a quickie and only lasts 2 minutes.