Even if you’re not a full-fledged introvert by nature, having small children can turn you into a bit of a recluse. You might not notice it happening, but slowly you grow more and more accustomed to not wearing a bra, throwing your phone across the room the second someone calls you, hiding behind the couch in the fetal position whenever your doorbell rings, or writhing on the floor as if you’re having an allergic reaction whenever you have to wear pants or someone tries to engage you in small talk.
If the thought of peopleing for longer than, at most, a couple of hours has you shook, here’s a meme roundup from some fellow parents who have #introvertproblems just like you. Refer to this roundup whenever you’re trying to avoid people by pretending to do things on your phone.
1. I’m a rebel like that
You might say I’m “weird” and “off-putting,” but I say…you’re probably right in that assessment.
2. No, really
One of the perks of being an introvert is becoming exceptionally lonely and craving social interaction, planning get-togethers to catch up with friends, and then feeling so drained by said get-togethers that you go into hiding for another 6 month stint.
3. Momtroverts assemble!
This definition of a momtrovert is spot-on.
4. All of the nopes
I dare a bitch to make me get up out of this car and intermingle with other parents. Also, what do you mean my kid wasn’t invited to your kid’s party?
5. Introvert Problems
I want friends, I just don’t want to have to go through that awkward initial phase where you feel the need to clean, wear a bra, and censor your language. Gross.
The risk is worth the reward when you finally make the second type of friend in this meme.
7. “If I can’t see you, you can’t see me.”
I mumble to myself as I peer at people through my hands while hiding behind the water fountain.
8. Oh, how fun!
Who needs friends when you and your wine reflection have so much fun cackling maniacally together?
9. So much shade
My level of avoiding people could be considered a recreational sport.
10. Let’s handle this in a mature manner…
…By playing rock, paper, scissors to see who has to greet the pizza guy.
11. Well, that settles it
Once the bra comes off, socializing is off the table.
12. I will physically fight you
Whenever I see you next, which could be in the next 2-200 weeks.
13. Oh-woah, sweet child of mine
It’s neat when you notice your children starting to take after you.
14. Like music to my ears
“We don’t have any plans,” may sound pathetic to some, but it sounds like a great success to fellow introverts.
15. Minimal effort
A lot of effort goes into avoiding people. Give us some damn credit.
This is my, “I’m uncomfortable around people” face.
17. This is preposterous
Can I tag my cats?
18. Internet Mom Squad ain’t nothin’ to fuck with
Online mom tribes are the best because you can be as disgusting as you’d like and no one will even bat an eye.
19. Some say I’m mysterious
Is it you? Is it society as a whole? No one knows. No one but me.
20. I’m not moving
Would I like to dress up every now and then and enjoy casual banter with some acquaintances of mine? Absolutely the fuck not.
21. Some people would say I’m living the dream
Me. I am some people. Murder doc me, binch.
22. The Introvert Mom Struggle
Being an introvert mom truly is a struggle. You have to foster your child’s independence and interests, and that usually involves having to live your biggest nightmare on the daily – standing in a room full of strangers.
As the significant other of an introvert, you are not allowed to call me on my awkward introvert-y bullshit. It’s in the rule book.
If this meme roundup saved you from engaging in awkward conversation, or you enjoyed it and think another momtrovert would enjoy reading this from inside their blanket fort, hit that share button and let the good times roll.