Every so often we all do it. Go through an ambitious Pinterest phase where we feel like doing all the things with our kids such as crafting, adventuring, and spending time doing things in the kitchen.
What they don’t tell you on Pinterest is that cooking or baking with your kids is basically a recipe for frustration and rage… served with a side of no-good, nasty, gross food.
Baking with kids is like your worst nightmare covered in sugar. There’s flour on the walls, butter on ceiling, and chances are you may have had the urge to get into the rum. Cooking with kids is a very similar outcome, the only difference being that, oh shit- dinner is ruined!
The thing is, we’ll continue to do this shit because the mom guilt struggle is real, and we’re all suckers for the idea of having a picture-perfect family day with our kids. Somehow it seems that if we could only get together in our color-coordinated matching jammies and blast out some calzones or Rice Krispie treats, that maybe we won’t feel like such a failure, or notice that the world is on fire.
One can hope, right?!
14 Tweets That Show Cooking or Baking With Kids is a Recipe for Disaster
1. In other words, it’s basically poison. Gross poison.
“The kids helped make it!”
“Don’t eat that.”
— Lurkin' Mom (@LurkAtHomeMom) December 2, 2018
2. As the parent, you need to be extra hydrated for all this.
The recipe never mentions how much wine you will need to get through baking cookies with your kids.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) December 21, 2016
3. Baking AND cleaning? What a treat!
3: you have chocolate on your arm (licks me)
Me: uh, thanks…I guess.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) August 1, 2015
4. The newest challenge, quick- let’s make this a thing
Food Network’s Kids Baking Championship: Clean Your Fucking Dishes.
Someone make this happen.
— Julie Burton (@ksujulie) June 1, 2019
5. Add this to the lengthy list of reasons to fucking hate YouTube.
Our youngest has been watching YouTube videos on how to make her own snacks. This week she's made a cake-in-a-mug and an omelet-in-a-mug and a cookie-in-a-mug and right now she is making her own ice cream in a freezer bag CAN SOMEONE PLEASE SHUT DOWN YOUTUBE THANK YOU IN ADVANCE
— Rodney Lacroix (@RodLacroix) August 18, 2020
6. Again… you’re better off eating off the gas station bathroom floor than anything your gross kids have prepared.
Cooking with kids is just like crafting with kids: it can be fun, but do not eat anything you make.
— The Dad (@thedad) March 30, 2020
7. Like, seriously. Just trying to drive the point home here.
Anyone who thinks I'm gonna eat a cookie that their filthy kid made has another thing coming to them
— Gloria Fallon (@GloriaFallon123) December 17, 2019
8. How can a communication breakdown end up quite this messy?!
9. Maybe just burn everything you were wearing
Apparently, when you're cooking with kids you should ditch the apron and put on a black trash bag instead. Perhaps 2.
— jj hartinger (@jjhartinger) April 2, 2017
10. “It’s beginning to feel a lot like Christmas”
I must remember that baking with all 3 kids is not in fact a fun and bonding activity for the holidays but that within roughly 4 minutes I’ll be having a minor breakdown under the kitchen table
— MumInBits (@MumInBits) January 1, 2020
11. A far superior use of your time.
Nothing is better than baking cupcakes with your kids.
Except eating cupcakes without them of course.
— Relaxingmommy (@Relaxingmom) December 19, 2016
12. 0 out of 10 stars, do not recommend.
You try to be a good mom and then your 3 kids trash the kitchen making a "Kid British Baking Show" video, which would be cute except they really DESTROYED the kitchen and so you…make everybody cry.
In case anyone needs a parenting expert for their next article: I'm your girl.
— Hannah Grieco (@writesloud) June 22, 2020
13. Spending time with the kids is full of fun surprises.
I didn't know I had OCD until I tried baking with my kids.
— Ramblin Mama (@ramblinma) March 20, 2016
14. Let’s just let the experts handle this, shall we?
I'll make Christmas cookies with my kids and when it's time to eat them have Oreos instead because kids suck at baking.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) December 7, 2014
Let’s all send some thoughts and prayers to the parents out there who’re cooking with kids and pretending that it doesn’t suck!
It sucks, it’s the worst, and bless your sweet heart for trying anyway.
Now that’s some optimistic parenting effort. High five!