Raise your hand if you’re stressed out. That’s what I thought.
Maybe it’s because of work. Maybe it’s because your kids are driving you batshit. Maybe it’s because of adulting in general, with all its bills and errands and goddamn responsibilities. Regardless of what has you feeling off-kilter these days, this profanity-laden meditation video will help the sweariest among us find their inner peace.
Titled ‘F*ck That: An Honest Meditation,’ this video combines a soothing meditative voice-over with an undeniably satisfying “fuck you” to everything bringing you down.
The experience comes complete with several soul-centering phrases, including:
Gradually … let the horshit of the external world fade from your awareness.
If you find your mind wandering to other thoughts, don’t let it concern you. Just acknowledge that all that shit is fucking bullshit.
You’re here now, in this place, with your inner stillness. Those bitches can’t get under your skin.
All the soul-eating cocksuckers fall away into nothing.
While the 2-minute video, available on YouTube, is pretty fucking magical, there is a whole 15-minute deal available for Apple and Android devices, PLUS a book. Because you can never get too much motherfucking help with your chi, bitches.
So pull out your gadgets, head to a room of respite, light some candles, and prepare to melt the bullshit away.