New Legislation Proposes Mandatory Licensing for Having Babies

New Legislation Proposes Mandatory Licensing for Having Babies

By Crystal Foose of SoSoMom

A new bill introduced in Congress today would make it illegal for people to have babies without first undergoing home inspections and background checks by a social worker. The bill proposes that ideally, parents would apply for a parenting license before becoming pregnant but would also have a fast-track option for unplanned pregnancies. Anyone caught having babies without a license would have their children removed until the parents complied.

The senator sponsoring the bill says we have many laws to help protect children from those who desperately want a child and seek to adopt but do nothing to protect children from biological parents who may or may not be as excited to become parents. He continued by saying, “For all we know, there may be children out there being raised by biological parents in homes without safety gates, cabinet locks, and electrical outlet covers! The state needs to protect all children, not only those who are lucky enough to be adopted into families that are proven safe by social workers.”

The funding for the large increase in social workers needed would come from parenting licensure fees. The senator defended the unpopular proposed fee by saying, “You can’t get a driver’s license without a fee or even go fishing without paying a fee for a license. Why should we allow people to do something as important as parenting our country’s children without a fee?”

A small rally held by the Council for Reproductive Equality was held outside the Capitol building to bring awareness to the bill. The Council is a major supporter of the bill, and the president of this organization told reporters, “After all, isn’t it only fair that society does to the fertile what advanced maternal age and reproductive abnormalities have done to the infertile? We are just fighting for equality!”

One man watching the rally echoed the thoughts of many opponents to the bill, asking, “Wouldn’t it also be fair just to make adoption easier?” These opponents claim to have a more common sense, non-totalitarian solution and simply want to eliminate the costly, bureaucratic barriers to adoption.


About the Author

Crystal Foose is the mother of seven, ranging in age from 1-16. She hopes her readership appreciates her satire more than her horrified expository writing peers from her college days. She writes about motherhood and poop at Find her on Facebook