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Mother Doesn’t Vaccinate Her Kids, Believes Essential Oils Cure Anything

February 8, 2018 By Mock Mom

By Joanna McClanahan of Ramblin’ Mama

Local mother-of-two and self-proclaimed “granola mom” Ana Smugg (pronounced Aw-nah, she asked us to specify) recently sat down to explain her side of the recent backlash that has arisen regarding her refusal to vaccinate her children.

The case has received national attention as Smugg’s children go to school in Washington state, where vaccines are required for children to attend public school.

“This is a case of discrimination, pure and simple,” said Smugg. “It’s so upsetting to see the ignorant comments all over social media from parents who don’t believe in freedom of choice.

“There are plenty of reasons for parents to be wary of vaccinations. Everyone knows vaccines are made from formaldehyde, mercury, aluminum, aborted fetal and animal tissues, cetyltrimethylammonium bromide, MSG, polysorbate 80, etc. You can read more about them on sites like earthnews.biz or on my personal blog: Crunchy Mama.”

“Vaccines should be optional, not mandated,” says Smugg, who doesn’t let her children consume food that contains dyes or gluten.

But there is one thing that Smugg believes will keep her children from getting sick: Essential oils. In fact, she has decided to launch a line of essential-oil vaccines called DeTERRENT.

Essential oils are not designed to be ingested, but that hasn’t stopped this mom from taking “science” into her own hands, literally.

“This is where I mix the oils for the DeTERRENT. At first it was just a mix of Thieves and Lavender, but we realized we could mix as many as we want to create a vaccine that is a healthy, probably non-toxic alternative.”

It should be noted that her “vaccines” have not yet been approved by the FDA or anyone with common sense.

And they smell like ass.

*****

About the Author

Joanna McClanahan is an editor at MockMom, as well as a Staff Writer and Social Media Manager at Scary Mommy. She also makes jokes and memes as Ramblin’ Mama. Follow her on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram for more hilarity.

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  • About the Author
Mock Mom

About Mock Mom

MockMom is a satire-based corner of the internet where parents can come to cry-laugh about the trials of life with kids. Panty-wadding prohibited. Interested in contributing? Visit our submissions page for details. You can also help support our creative juices by donating to our tip jar.

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