His Facebook profile states that he is single, but based on some of the comments on his photos, he won't be for long!
Humor News/Trending Sex and Relationships

Man’s Hilarious Quarantine Dating Profile Is The Laugh We Desperately Need

Things in the world are crazy right now. In a matter of weeks, we’ve become intimately acquainted with the terms “coronavirus,” “COVID-19,” “pandemic,” and the latest, “social distancing.” A minuscule bug is wreaking havoc on all of our lives, and even the House of Mouse isn’t immune.

We have witnessed events we never dreamed would happen outside of a Hollywood blockbuster. Events which the gazillion episodes of Walking Dead have left me woefully unprepared for. Nowhere did they mention that toilet paper would make a meteoric rise in social status from mere bumfodder to the hottest commodity in the world.

Coronavirus has launched a toilet-paper apocalypse, hand sanitizer armageddon, and the revival of the movie Contagion which is on track to becoming the most downloaded movie of ALL TIME. What is even happening?

Amidst all the doom and gloom, the school closures, the panic buying, and the declarations of emergency, there is a ray of light.

His name is Nate.

Photo Credit: Facebook/NateHoffeditz

Say hello to Prince Charmin©️, aka Nate Hoffeditz. Forget wealth and social status, forget about royal lineage. None of it matters. Nate has just become the world’s most eligible bachelor because he has what we’re all looking for. And he’s willing to share it with that special someone.

In a Facebook post captioned “Dating profiles during the quarantine be like…” Nate poses with some of the hottest and rarest commodities right now.  From cleaners and soaps to face masks, canned goods, and gloves, it’s clear Nate knows what we want. What we really really want. Fellow bachelors and bachelorettes, take note.

The post has gone viral with over 47K likes, 27K comments, and 147K shares. And while the pictures are enticing, it’s the accompanying descriptions that really steal the show.

Take a look:

“The only thing infectious in this home… is laughter.”

Photo Credit: Facebook/NateHoffeditz

“Just looking for a love that’s non-perishable…”

Photo Credit: Facebook/NateHoffeditz

“The only thing I’m not afraid of catching, is feelings.”

Photo Credit: Facebook/NateHoffeditz

“Baby you should let me gLOVE you.”

Photo Credit: Facebook/NateHoffeditz

According to his Twitter handle, Nathan Hoffeditz @N8hoffeditz, Nate describes himself as someone who likes food, sports, people and animals.

This is the REAL Nathan Hoffeditz Twitter page. I like food, sports, and the great outdoors. I also like people and animals. Except cats. Jk but seriously…

So any cat lovers out there need not apply.

In addition, he obviously has a great sense of humor. Something we are all in desperate need of as we navigate these difficult times. His Facebook profile states that he is single, but based on some of the comments on his photos, he won’t be for long!

I would swipe right 💯 😂

Single in NJ, just sayin. 😉😍

OMG!!! I would totally date you, so I could use your black KitchenAid stand mixer in the background! PROP well played!

I’ll be your forever if you be my always.

You had me at the smile! 😉…and the scentiva! 😂

Knight in Charmin Armour.

That’s Sooo HOTT !

We know that COVID-19 is no joke. The uncertainty of the times we are living in is unsettling. We are all wondering when this nightmare will end. But in the meantime, it’s important to find some pops of joy and levity.

So thank you, Nate, for giving us a welcome reprieve and a laugh in the face of the madness. And if you happen to have a roll to spare, we’d be forever grateful.