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Dad Feeds Kid Pop-Tart That’s Not Pink Enough, Lives to Tell About It

By Kari of My Questionable Life

It was a typical Wednesday. Charlie’s wife Sara was volunteering in the library at their son’s elementary school, which meant Charlie would have the pleasure of spending the morning with his precious and always reasonable 3-year-old daughter, Pearl.

Charlie had plans to feed his daughter breakfast, a special treat he knew she’d love and would eat without hesitation. After that they’d play dress up and have a tea party. It would be an idyllic morning.

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Then, suddenly, things took an unexpected and ugly turn. What should have been a loving father-daughter moment erupted into hysteria when Daddy’s little princess began writhing around on the floor like a possessed, demonic creature.

What could have evoked such an outburst from this otherwise calm and rational 3-year-old? Well, as it turns out, Charlie had the audacity to serve her royal highness a Pop-Tart that wasn’t anywhere near as pink as the ones she was accustomed to.

Pearl was understandably confused and shocked that her father, the man who professed to love her, would make such an egregious error by presenting her with something so inadequate. Charlie, at a loss for words and unable to calm his shrieking daughter, was forced to call his wife and summon her home for help in soothing their dear girl.

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Upon rushing home from her volunteer responsibilities, Sara found Charlie curled up in the fetal position, mumbling incoherent and broken sentences. She found their darling Pearl furiously munching on the aforementioned inedible and “not pink enough” Pop-Tart. Understandably, Pearl was famished and severely lacking in energy after her unusual and particularly jarring tantrum.

Sara calmed Pearl down using some deep breathing techniques she’d seen from some viral Facebook post on raising happy toddlers while Charlie recovered from the morning’s events by taking a nap.

Sara stated that she blames the industrial machine in charge of icing these sugar-laden breakfast pastries as well as the quality control team for missing the subtle difference in shades of pink before packaging these up and sending them out for public consumption.

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Surely Charlie couldn’t have anticipated this outcome. Everyone knows that 3-year-olds are usually patient, accepting and understanding of the world around them.

In an attempt to get justice, Sara and Charlie enlisted the help of an attorney. They are looking into whether or not their case against the Pop-Tart company is viable. Their attorney believes Charlie deserves and is entitled to fair and just compensation. The pain and suffering he endured during a tantrum that was brought on by circumstances that could have been prevented by this careless company was unnecessary. Their attorney also feels a proper settlement should help to aid in the PTSD Charlie experiences every time he sees a box of the infamous breakfast pastries.

Since “The Incident,” Pearl has once again been a model 3-year-old, demonstrating how reasonable and forgiving children of her age truly are. This family is now on the road to recovery. They are sharing their experience in hopes that other parents out there can be spared. They caution you to inspect any food you’re going to be giving to your children to ensure that it’s the proper color and taste they’ve come to expect.

We wish Sara, Charlie and little Pearl well as they continue on as a united family seeking justice.

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About the Author

Kari is a sahm to two kids, ages 6 and 3. She started writing as a way to capture the insanity that comes with being a wife and mother. You can find her at My Questionable Life and on Twitter and Facebook.