12 Signs You're a Working Mother
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12 Signs You’re a Working Mom

12 Signs You're a Working Mother

Working moms, be prepared to nod your heads in agreement.

1. You’ve taken 10 sick days this year and not a single one was for you.

2. When you actually are sick, you go to work anyway because you don’t have any sick days left.

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3. When your work day is done, there is a brief nanosecond of relief, followed by the impending reality that you’re off to your “second” full-time job which has way more demanding “employees.”

4. You find ways to avoid picking up your children from daycare, just to get five more minutes of time for yourself, even though those five minutes are often spent running errands or, in my case, grading papers (Gasp!  Did she just say she’d rather grade papers than pick up her kids?  Blasphemy, I know.)

5. Take-out night is a must, minimally once a week.  This is not to be confused with pizza delivery night.

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6. You find yourself, in the middle of the afternoon, pulling into the back of the Target parking lot, setting your phone alarm for ten minutes, and taking a quick snooze.

7. Your idea of “downtime” is grocery shopping at 7 pm (when you finally have the time) without the kids.

8. Your fridge is full of wine (pick your poison).

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9. Your ideal Saturday night is being in bed by 8 pm watching Netflix (because the thought of staying out past midnight to hang with friends sounds like way too much effort, and the kids are still getting up by 6 am, your schedule be damned).

10. You realize you’ve gone a week without actually talking to your husband (requests, demands, complaints, and reminders don’t count).

11. You realize you’ve run out of wine and you legitimately start lamenting your pitiful existence.

12. When the kids are finally down for the night,  all you want is to not speak to anyone, so when your husband finally wants to catch up with you on the day or, God forbid, snuggle, you blast him with the lasers shooting out of your eye sockets.

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A sign you’re a working mom of a child with special needs:

Add in at least a couple of hours a week of therapy for your child.