Look, nothing about virtual learning is easy but at least we can enjoy a few good laughs like this one between all the bouts of crying.
Education News/Trending

#ZoomOfTheFlies Thread Hilariously Captures The Sh*tshow That Is Zooming With 2nd Graders

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I do not know how elementary school teachers do it.

After months of getting a first-hand taste of the horror that is trying to wrangle young children enough to actually sit and LEARN, I have damn well lost my mind. I fear I may never find it again.

And as a new school year commences, with no pandemic reprieve in sight, many of us are continuing to live the dream. Read nightmare. Because I feel as though Dante’s 9 circles of hell would have looked a little different if he had had to do virtual school with littles. As in, there would have only been one circle. One long endless circle of fidgeting, limited attention span, talking, farting, and chaos.

Thankfully we are not suffering alone. Wonderful teachers are right there alongside us. Virtually zooming in and out of our children’s lives, trying their best to teach a herd of feral cats that they can see (when said cats are actually sitting which is basically never) but cannot touch.

And if you thought trying to rustle up a classroom full of 30 students was hard enough to do in person, try doing it on Zoom.

Like this grade 2 teacher. Whose screen just so happened to freeze in the middle of a lesson and who, subsequently, disappeared from the call completely.

Welcome to #ZoomOfTheFlies.

In a hilariously real Twitter feed, mom and writer Stephanie Lucianovic documented the mass chaos that ensued on the day the teacher’s Zoom died and OMG I can’t stop laughing.

She begins her tale of the grade 2s descent into anarchy with the following words:

As you can imagine, it took mere seconds for the shenanigans to start. There was screaming. There was babbling. And there was something about a diamond.

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And pizza. Because kids are constantly hungry. Except when it comes to the dinner you just slaved over for the past 30 minutes.

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As for the diamond? No one wanted to see it, apparently.

To which Stephanie muted her own 2nd-grade son. Because she wanted to see a diamond.

Spoiler alert: there was no diamond.

There was, however, something to see outside in the sky, RIGHT NOW.

Which also turned out to be NOTHING. And which wreaked havoc in Stephanie’s house when her son, in his desire to see the great nothingness, knocked over his pencil bucket.

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It is at this point that one of the other parents, who is also a teacher, attempted to gain control.

It did not go well.

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Meanwhile:

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And in the midst of all of the chaos? Some genius decided to hit “RECORD” prompting the vice principal to send a very “stringent email” later that day forbidding parents and students from recording Zoom sessions.

Eventually, Stephanie decided that she had had enough. She attempted to leave the meeting but her son yelled that HE had to be the one to leave the meeting. He’s not wrong.

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It wasn’t all bad. One kid did try to reign it in. He failed.

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Ultimately, Stephanie’s son did leave the meeting.

However, the story doesn’t end here. Her son filled her in on some of the details that she missed. One kid demanded that the student host make him a co-host. Another kid changed his name.

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I would have guessed fart but “blah blah blah blah” is good too.

And just in case you’re worried about the teacher, don’t be. She’s fine.

Look, nothing about virtual learning is easy but at least we can enjoy a few good laughs like this one between all the bouts of crying.

You can read the entire thread here.