Sleep Deprivation Mommy™ is the must-have for the toddler set, especially those who have new siblings. They don’t deserve it, though, because in truth, they’ve been pretty darn naughty: turning the shower on during newborn’s first bath, head-butting their brother every time he tries to nurse, giving the whole family bronchitis, and insisting on night-time potty training RIGHT NOW.

Features of the Sleep Deprivation Mommy™ doll include:

– Walks/lurches and talks (Has no idea what she’s said)

– Calls you by the wrong name

– Will let you watch all the TV you want

– Only makes cereal for dinner

– Comes with her own coffee cup to drink out of and eventually lose

– Has fun Sleep-on-Her-Feet mode

– Has less-fun Creepy-Ass-Girl-From-the-Ring mode

– Has shadows under her eyes that grow and grow until you give her a glass of wine and put her to bed

– Appears to not mind being dragged around by toddlers while half-dressed (Shirts sold separately)

– Leaves all the Christmas presents in her Amazon cart, then provides half-assed explanation of “Santa Claus as cultural phenomenon” on Christmas morning. Will make it up to you on your birthday…maybe.

– Cries real tears

*****

About the Author

Sarah Curry is a writer and a mom. Sometimes she’s funny. Sometimes she’s giving you a look. Visit her on Twitter @SarahManonCurry.