By Lola Lolita
A recent study of one found that people tend to feel thankful toward friends and family when they are belittled, particularly on social media. According to experts, people feel the most gratitude when friends and family accuse them of things they did not do or intend, citing an increase in gratitude when such accusations are made publicly.
“Just the other day, I tweeted something about having to work late,” explained a local woman. “My friend instantly copied the tweet and posted it to her Facebook timeline, claiming I was deliberately rubbing the fact that I have a job and she doesn’t in her face.”
“After reading her 4 paragraph diatribe about how it is my mission to lower her self-esteem any chance I get, I realized what a selfish asshole I am, so I called her up to thank her for bringing that to my attention,” said the woman.
Of particular interest to experts was the gratefulness subjects experienced when friends and family insisted they were wrong about something in a public forum. “Subjects experience the most indebtedness toward their assailants when the comments contain personal attacks and are laced with condescension,” reported one expert. “A complete disregard for the impact of one’s words and potential hurtfulness is a must for this level of thankfulness to result.”
Perhaps most interesting to researchers was victims’ willingness to change the whole way they view the world as a result of such belittling.
“My step-brother interrupted a conversation I was having with a friend of mine to let me know how much of a dickhead hypocrite I was,” recounted a college student. “And I was like, Yeah, man, I totally am and never would have realized that if you hadn’t insisted on jumping in and colorfully reminding me what a douche bag you think I am.”
“It’s powerful stuff,” continued the young man. “I’m, like, a completely different person now thanks to my bro. I mean, I’m seeing things only from my step-brother’s sullied perspective of the world, and it’s just great. Just the other day, I totally found myself reading into a complete stranger’s comment and assuming she meant nothing but the absolute worst by it. It’s just, like, super liberating, you know?”
Experts plan to extend their research to studying the impact of sticking one’s nose where it doesn’t fucking belong on strengthening personal relationships.
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About the Author
Lola Lolita is the founder of Sammiches and Psych Meds. Follow along on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram.