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Mom Looks Forward to Bleak January

By Marlene Kern Fischer of Thoughts From Aisle Four

A mother of three was reportedly extremely enthusiastic about spending January trapped in the house with her young children. With an already colder than normal winter underway, and a polar vortex predicted to continue for at least several months, the mom was eagerly anticipating many school cancellations and delays.

When interviewed for this article, the mother giddily stated, “With the holidays in the rear view mirror and all the toys my children received already broken or misplaced and their board games missing pieces, we will have lots of opportunities to bond.

“My children actually love playing in the snow. I never tire of bundling the younger ones up, putting their boots on, hearing them state they have to pee, undressing them, then re-bundling them and sending them outside, only to have them return 30 minutes later to use the bathroom again or say they are cold. It’s every mother’s dream, isn’t it? I truly don’t mind those melted snow puddles and can mop them up in no time at all,” she cheerfully stated, adding that she sometimes joins her children outside because she loves refereeing snowball fights and pulling them down the street on a sled like a “sled dog.”

Commenting that her husband seemed to be able to dig out and get to work no matter how high the snow drifts, she praised his work ethic, saying, “That man will make it to the office no matter what. In fact, he seems extra enthusiastic about leaving when he knows that school is canceled. I can’t imagine anyone being a more conscientious worker or being more devoted to a job. He does this all for us and we are so lucky.”

The woman also marveled at how her husband managed to make it into work even when his office was closed.

The mom said that on snow days, after making hot cocoa and s’mores and cleaning the kitchen for the fourth time in six hours, she often sits her children down for a few hours of schoolwork, an activity she admitted is often met with mixed reactions.

“I’m not sure why they don’t love the additional worksheets I give them and why they continuously threaten to report me to Child Protective Services,” she explains, mentioning how blessed she felt to be able to spend snow days witnessing tantrums, arguments, and hearing her children repeat the phrase, “I’m bored.”

She also said that she didn’t understand why, when she phoned other mothers to discuss how wonderful it was to have their children home day after day, they often hung up on her. She shrugged and philosophically noted that “perhaps some people find warmth and sunshine appealing.”

The mom said that she enjoyed the short days, arctic temperatures, gray skies, icy roads, and snow so much, she was considering relocating to Alaska “so that every day can be a snow day.” She has already contacted a real estate broker and asked her husband to request a transfer to his company’s Anchorage office.

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About the Author

Marlene Kern Fischer is a wife, mother of three sons, food shopper extraordinaire, lifelong writer, blogger and college essay editor. She graduated cum laude from Brandeis University with a degree in literature. Her work has been featured on CollegiateParent, Kveller, Grown and Flown, the Erma Bombeck Writers’s Workshop, Her View From Home, Beyond Your Blog and Better After 50. You can read more of her work on her blog: Thoughts From Aisle Four.