MockMom

Mom Barely Surviving Target Checkout Line Still Forced to Hear About REDcard

By Julie Vick of julievick.com

Area woman Helen Meeker told reporters that even though she was barely managing to get through the Target checkout line with her two small children, the checkout clerk still tried to sell her on the REDcard.

On Thursday, Meeker said she hadn’t planned to leave the house with her baby and toddler, but she really needed diapers and a shot of espresso if she was going to survive the rest of the day.

Meeker reported that she grabbed her items and then got in line while the baby was in a carrier and the toddler rode in the shopping cart. Everyone seemed calm, and she thought she might just make it through the line without any meltdowns.

A customer that was behind Meeker in line said, “I was just about to tell her how well behaved her kids were, when I saw the man in front of her pull out a Ziploc bag of pennies to pay for his items. That’s when the baby started screaming.”

Meeker was trying to calm the baby down when her toddler dumped his bag of insanely nutritious snacks on the floor and then started grabbing his pants but denying he had to go potty.

“I could have left right then,” Meeker said, “but we were so close to the front of the line. I thought the clerk would realize my kids were at their limit, and he would help us make a quick exit,” but instead he slowly scanned each item as he relayed the 5,000 benefits of owning a REDcard: the credit card the store offers.

“I’m sure it’s a great deal,” Meeker said later. “But there was no way in hell I was going to fill out an application for a credit card while I had two crying children hanging off me.”

When Meeker told him, “Not today,” he said he understood. Then as he bagged her last item he asked, “Now, have you heard about Cartwheel?”

Meeker just grabbed her bags and ran toward the door.

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About the Author

Julie Vick is a writer living in Colorado whose work has appeared in McSweeney’s Internet Tendency, Brain, Child, and Mom.me. You can read more of her work at julievick.com or follow her on Twitter @vickjulie.