An article titled A 23-Year-Old Woman From Wisconsin Is Auctioning Her Virginity And I Am Here For It caught my attention this morning. I totally took the bait and clicked on the link. I don’t judge you for doing the same, because in the wake of the Me Too and Time’s Up movements, I thought for sure this 23-year-old would be doing more than selling her body for cash. This must be a spotlight on the dangers sex workers and prostitutes encounter on a daily basis. She must be raising money or at least awareness for a good cause. There must be more meaning behind this story, right?
NOPE.
Bailey Gibson, equipped with a doctor’s letter confirming an intact hymen, is selling her virginity to the highest bidder because money and revenge. After her ex-boyfriend cheated on her because he couldn’t wait until marriage to have sex, Gibson seems to have thrown out all of her once-valued sense of self and teamed up with Moonlite Bunny Ranch to sell her “purity”—as if a vagina that has had a penis inside of it is no longer pure. Dennis Hof, owner of the legal brothel located in Nevada, will get half of what Gibson “earns.”
https://twitter.com/bunnyranch/status/963951285996105728
Let’s break this down a bit, shall we? Bailey Gibson and the author of the article I read this morning assume virginity is based on whether a penis has entered a vagina or not. I have never had more than a tampon in my vagina (or speculum, if you want to get real personal) and I am FAR from a virgin. I am a queer person with a vagina who likes vaginas attached to female identified people. I know that is a mouth full. And yes, that’s what she said.
While Gibson’s sexuality may be heterosexual and her definition of virginity is tied to sex with a penis, this ridiculous act of auctioning off the first time she has sex is in no way “feminism at its finest,” which is what the author of the article called Gibson’s publicity stunt.
Feminism is about equality between the sexes. It’s not about seeing how much money you can get from the heteronormative idea that intercourse between a cis-gender man and cis-gender woman is the only way to define sex. Feminism is not about promoting a brothel full of women who are dependent on men and their dicks to make a living.
Feminism is not about giving half of her earnings to a dick who is willing to pay millions and millions of dollars to have sex with a virgin. Feminism is not about celebrating the dick that is so much more interested in putting money where a hymen is than in an actual worthy hole in our society, like homelessness or poverty.
Feminism is about equal rights for all women, including the bisexual, lesbian, queer, or transgender women. Bailey Gibson has received a bid of nearly two million dollars but is hoping for at least 10 million for her virginity. She wants a guy with a penis to pay her 10 MILLION DOLLARS to pop her cherry. And you know what? She will probably get it. Because of men and purity and gross assholes who only feel good if they are burying their cock where it’s not really desired.
What if Gibson happened to be a transgender woman with a vagina? There is no way she would get a fraction of this money. Not because she is less of a woman or less worthy, but because men are trans- and homophobic.
And what if a transgender man was willing to pay 10 million dollars to rock her world without a penis? Would his version of sex be less meaningful? NO.
And what about the women who have been assaulted or raped? What about the women who were virgins until someone took that away from them? Would their first sexual encounter with a loving partner be less virtuous because technically she was not a virgin? NO.
I am not here for any of this. Gibson is not doing any women any favors, least of all herself.
She may be selling her virginity and body for a shit-ton of money, but she is selling herself so short.
When Gibson was asked about the very real possibility that the buyer will be gross, she answered, “He probably will be. If he’s paying that much, I don’t care one bit. He can look like the Grinch.” She went on to say that her plan was just to close her eyes and imagine the dollar signs.
That statement makes me so incredibly sad. Yes, she has a choice in the matter. Yes, she is making bank on her “commodity.” But at the expense of letting go of what she once held onto as important? And on the ride of one man’s penis and his disgusting ego?
You deserve way more than that, Bailey Gibson. Feminism deserves way more than that. And your vagina deserves way more enjoyment than a business transaction.