I remember meeting someone once who said they had never experienced anxiety. I’m pretty sure I looked at them as if they grew three heads. Anxiety has been as much a part of me since childhood as my feet, or my hands, or my brain itself. Anxiety is like a little tick that’s burrowed inside my brain, constantly interrupting my peace and quiet with a steady barrage of paranoid fuckery.
However, it’s not just me. Anxiety affects many of us, and especially as parents we are hit with the double punch of worry and responsibility. It is rare to meet a mother or adult in general who hasn’t experienced anxiety. According to the Anxiety and Depression Association of America, anxiety disorders affect around 18% of adults in the United States.
Anxiety is manageable, but it can be a long and difficult road. However, many of us use humor to cope with the struggle. Anxiety is a pain in the ass for sure, but it also happens to be such a relatable experience that it can make for some great jokes.
Here Is a List of 15 Funny Anxiety Tweets
They’ll be sure to make you laugh-cry between dreaming up catastrophic scenarios and diagnosing yourself with WebMD.
1. This will be so relaxing… right?
Adult coloring books are great since nothing cures anxiety like being exclusively in charge of details that may potentially ruin everything.
— AsKateWouldHaveIt (@KateWouldHaveIt) April 9, 2018
2. Anxiety! It pops up in the darndest places
A major source of my anxiety is following a hostess through a crowded restaurant.
— Heather Wheeler-Sadlemire (@HeatherLWheeler) September 17, 2016
3. It’s gonna be a long week
The first rule of Anxiety Club is that you will replay every single conversation you've had here today in your head for the next seven days.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) February 8, 2018
4. It’s all in how you frame it
"Anxiety disorder" sounds so negative. I prefer the more festive "Smörgåsbord of Stress."
— Housewife of Hell (@HousewifeOfHell) February 11, 2016
5. A noble itinerary
I came, I saw, I remembered I have social anxiety and snuck out before anyone could notice me.
— Ramblin Mama (@ramblinma) July 1, 2016
6. I can feel their eyes burning into my throbbing skull
|| Social Anxiety Levels ||
Low- making phone calls
Medium – speaking in public
THREAT LEVEL MIDNIGHT – putting my carry on in the overhead bin while the whole plane watches
— Sara Buckley (@nottheworstmom) May 8, 2018
7. So close
Me: Looks like I made it through PMS this month without an anxiety atta—-
Anxiety: (Adele voice) Hello….
— Crystal Lowery Comedian (@Crystalllowery) June 12, 2019
8. It’s my plus one
Hate to disappoint, but the only things I'm bringing to your potluck are my social anxiety and my resting bitch face
— ~*Wellness Witchery*~ (@TheMandiEm) April 19, 2018
9. When your anxiety is better at presentations than you are
Me: so glad to get to bed early tonight
Anxiety: ya know, there could be literally like 100 fatal problems happening in your body that you don’t even know about yet. Let’s review…
— Janina Maria (@dontlosethekids) January 28, 2018
10. Literally anything could be how you die. G’night!
Ever taken a sip of something and felt it go down like a fiery golf ball making its way through your esophagus and thought… “is this how I die?”
No? Just me?
— MomTransparenting (@momtransparent1) February 20, 2019
11. It’s a bargain
Why pay for a gym membership when you can have crippling anxiety for FREE!
— Sara Buckley (@nottheworstmom) November 25, 2017
12. Bitch, I might
I’m thinking about quitting my job and pursuing anxiety full-time.
— Mike Primavera (@primawesome) August 27, 2014
13. I’m an enigma, wrapped in a resting bitch face
My soul is telling me to go make friends. But my anxiety, my anxiety is telling me to be completely unapproachable.
— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) August 30, 2016
14. The best part of waking up…
Chaperoning a field trip, fueled by coffee and anxiety.
— Sara Says Stop (@PetrickSara) October 25, 2018
15. That sounds worse. I’m in!
Them: Don't worry about it!
Anxiety: Or – hear me out – we could incessantly worry about unpleasant hypothetical outcomes you have no control over.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) February 19, 2018
If you struggle with anxiety, you can find a list of online resources from the Anxiety and Depression Association of America here.
If you do have anxiety, know that you’re not alone. Sure, it’s not all shits and giggles, but sometimes it can be fun to try and find a laugh in all the madness.