Little girls love pink. Light pink, dark pink, glittery pink... all pink, all the time. This mom says hell no! And is determined to fight the pink fairy.
Humor Life Parenting

The Pink Fairy Threw Up in My Daughter’s Closet

Little girls love pink. Light pink, dark pink, glittery pink... all pink, all the time. This mom says hell no! And is determined to fight the pink fairy.

By Diana Kane of Mama Needs a Cupcake

I tried to open the door slowly so I didn’t have a seizure brought on by the sensory overload of pink that was pouring out of my daughter’s closet.

Unfortunately, a belligerent pink fairy had snuck in there and threw-up.

I cringed a little bit as she pushed passed my legs and through the partially opened door into her “sanctuary.” A deep sigh and I barreled in behind her. How on earth did we get to this repulsive level of pink? She has only been living for three short years.

I have recently become overly conscious of the amount of pink my daughter is wearing. So much so, that I steer clear of the toddler girl section as we meander through a department store, the “pink fairy” heavily adorning every rack labeled 3T. I could see it from across the store, and I was NOT going over there. Until she announced that she had to tee-tee and I knew I was in trouble, only to emerge from the restroom into a sea of pink.  “Oh, Mommy, look! Mommy, please take me closer. Mommy, I have money!” Which is true. Daddy snuck a five-dollar bill into her purse before we ventured out on our shopping trip. “Daddy said buy something pretty!” Defeated, I push the cart into the depths of my worst nightmare.

Like a moth to a flame, my child buzzed around the outfits gleaming with bright pink kitties and lacy pink ruffles.  My head was going to implode. “Sorry, baby…they don’t have your size.” Small harmless mommy lie. I grasped at a grey striped shirt with a small bird on the pocket. “This is cute, Sis.”

She wasn’t buying it. “Gasp! Hello Kitty!” She grabbed a bright pink pajama set off the rack. “I LOVE IT, Mom!” I looked it over. It was a 4T, but it definitely would have worked.

“It’s way too big, baby.” (I lied.) “We will look again at another store,” and I sprinted towards the doors to head home before she started into a full on meltdown.

This was not the first mommy lie I have told her, and it surely won’t be the last.

They only serve Happy Meals at 12:06 p.m., sweetie. We just missed it!

Peas give you super powers that make you really fast.

Santa called, and I told him you were not being good!

If you kiss the boys, your teeth will fall out.

Drinking pop will make you short, and tattoos will kill you.

I may be feeling a little guilty for today’s mommy lie, but I did pat myself on the back for successfully keeping yet another shade of fuchsia from creeping into her closet.  When we got home, she slipped into her Transformers costume and climbed up on her brother’s hand-me-down Lighting McQueen bike to ride around the neighborhood.  She, of course, stopped to jump in a mud puddle and torment a poor frog that was in the wrong place at the wrong time.  She had completely forgotten all about that horrific pink pajama set, and I was winning.

Oh, my sweet little girl.  Mommy loves you so much, I am willing to go to great lengths to lie to you. I am also willing to brawl with that belligerent pink fairy that keeps sneaking into your room.

This post was originally published on Mama Needs a Cupcake.


About Diana Kane

Diana Kane is a not so Pinterest mom who drinks way too much coffee and spends the rest of the day chasing her tail. She recently published her first book, “Mama Needs A Cupcake.” Follow her blog at Mama Needs a Cupcake and find her on Facebook as well.