My kids and I were hiking along the Puget Sound last summer when we stumbled across a pool of tiny tadpoles. We sat and watched them scoot around the water for a while. My daughter squealed with delight, dipping her hand in while they raced around it.

A park ranger came over and immediately I grew afraid that he’d chastise my child for playing. Instead, he began to tell us about this particular species.

“Something sad is going on with these frogs,” he began. “The mother frogs have noticed a shortage in the local food supply and they are in crisis. They simply can’t take care of the young frogs they already have, so they have begun to scoop the new batch of tadpoles out of the water so that they suffocate before they can grow into frogs.”

“Is this normal?” I replied.

“It has been known to happen when a mother frog notices one of the tadpoles has a defect that renders it unable to live outside the water,” he explained. “Such defects can happen very late in the tadpole phase, but it is still regarded as the most humane thing to do, since the tadpole is suffering. There are even certain tadpole defects that are unsafe for the mother frog’s health, so she has to scoop the afflicted tadpole out of the water so that she herself can survive and care for her other froglets.”

I nodded, though still confused. “But now the mother frogs are pulling healthy tadpoles out because the frog community is in crisis?”

“Yes.” He nodded.

“That’s terrible!” I exclaimed. “How do we stop this? What if we make a law to punish the mothers? For instance, we could flick them if they try to scoop any more tadpoles out of the water.”

“That won’t stop them from terminating the tadpoles,” he informed me. “They will just find a round-about way to do it–usually at night or in an unsafe place–putting their own lives at risk. And with the mother frogs injured or even dead, the baby froglets that already exist outside of the water won’t have anyone to look after them. They’ll die, too.”

He went on: “There is hope. We’ve learned that the best way to stop a mother frog from terminating her tadpole is to provide for her needs. In fact, whenever a liberal park ranger is in charge, he ensures there is enough food supply for the frogs, so we always see a decline in tadpole termination. The solution is simple: provide for the at-risk frog community, and mothers will no longer be in crisis. Furthermore, the little froglets that are already hopping around will have enough food in their bellies.”

I was skeptical and asked, “But won’t that cost money? My money?”

“Sure,” he said, “but it will really help change things. We can all stand to be more generous.”

“I don’t think so,” I snorted. “We should definitely punish those frogs when they scoop up their tadpoles. That goes against the sanctity of life, and it doesn’t cost me a thing.”

“Like I said, punishment doesn’t work,” he affirmed.

“But if I focus on the tadpoles’ sanctity of life, I can lazily vote for the park ranger based on this one issue,” I argued. “Combing through thegrayy areas of frogs in crisis takes too much thinking. Plus, I like to feel morally superior to liberal park rangers who won’t punish the mother frogs.”

“It’s your decision who you elect as park ranger. But what will you do when your conservative park ranger takes away the food that is helping the baby froglets who are already hopping around this pond?” he challenged.

“I don’t care about the lives of the born frogs. Just the tadpoles!” I declared. “Let the frogs fend for themselves. They can spiral downhill in a poverty cycle. They deserve to starve.”

The park ranger shook his head.

“Sanctity of life,” he muttered as he walked away.

With that, I packed our things and ushered my well-fed children back to our luxury SUV, where I sanctimoniously began searching my iPhone for park ranger candidates in favor of punishing the impoverished frog mothers of the Puget Sound.