MockMom

Woman Legally Changes Her Name to “Jacob’s Mom”

By Cara Marino

An area woman, formally known as Emily Stein, has legally changed her name to “Jacob’s Mom.” Upon leaving the local courthouse with new identification in tow, Jacob’s Mom said, “Now that I’m a mom, I don’t really need to be anyone else.”

She seemed exuberant, yet dead inside, as she hurried down the courthouse steps. “I really need to get home, because the sitter has a hard ‘out’ and my husband is working overtime.”

When pressed about her bold decision, she quickly replied, “It’s been years since people have seen me as anyone else but a mother, so really, this just made sense.” Jacob’s Mom, formerly also known as “Dave’s Wife,” was a Senior VP of Marketing for a large media company where she was then known as “Ms. Stein.”

After her maternity leave, 3 ½ years ago, her boss no longer gave her prestigious assignments, invited her to client meetings, or even looked her directly in the eye. Her role was gradually diminished until she was eventually let go.

It was then that she started reevaluating her life. “I started to see myself the way everyone else did, and it just made sense.”

Jacob’s Mom can be found on the local playground most weekdays or crying silently during toddler time at the local library on Wednesdays.

*****

About the Author

Cara Marino is a former television producer and current mom. She’s a nonsense enthusiast and lives in NYC with her husband, two stepdaughters, two dogs, and one human son.