By Sarah Curry
President Trump toured the Cincinnati Zoo today, where he engaged in a listening tour and was then slated to deliver an apology to animals for equating them with immigrants and gang members.
His first stop on his listening tour was to meet Baby Fiona, the world’s cutest hippo. However, when he realized Baby Fiona was no longer a baby, he became deeply annoyed. He said to Fiona, “You’ve gotten a little large, haven’t you?” and “You’re fat and have an ugly face.” Fiona wiggled her ears in response as if to say, “I can’t hear you,” or “Ditto.”
Trump then spent considerable time in the most boring part of the zoo, the reptile and amphibian house. In particular, he was transfixed by the West African Reed Frog. While everyone knows the old adage “A watched frog never has a sex change,” the President could not help but tap on the glass and say over and over, “I’m watching you.” The frog’s only response was to sprawl across a piece of bark and hold perfectly still until the President went away.
Trump then began picking on Nemo, a beloved fictional clown fish with one smaller fin. “Clownfish are crossdressers and aren’t even funny!” the President told a boy. “That’s right, Nemo’s a girl now. Gross, am I right?”
Trump then took the child’s ice cream, claiming it as a matter of national security, as hangry Presidents “start shit.” The boy ran to his mother who explained that crossdressing is a valid form of gender expression and that it’s perfectly okay for boys to cry, but it is not right to take someone’s ice cream cone. The two adults exchanged stink faces.
Post-ice cream cone, the sated and now-clear-thinking President toured the new $12-million gorilla enclosure and had a “great idea.” The plan remains a bit unclear, but seems to mostly involve putting immigrant children as young as 18 months in cages and separating them from their mothers.
“There’s a lot to be learned from zoos,” the President said, “when it comes to immigration policy.”
The zoo’s director, the Secretary of Homeland Security, and several gorillas could not be reached for comment.
Parents, have you called or emailed your Congressperson today?
The United States’ forced separation of children and parents at the border violates international human rights laws and, just as importantly, our values as a country and as parents. As a parent, my heart breaks for the families being separated at the border. Children as young as my one-year-old boy and four-year-old girl are torn away from their mamas and daddies, many of whom are seeking asylum.
My heart breaks for America. This isn’t us. We are so much better than this. Our congress people need to hear that every day. The hard part is that it seems like we don’t have much power to stop this. It can’t wait for an election. As much as we want to, we can’t go all Goodnight Gorilla and unlock each cell in the detention center.
So as parents, what can we do? Use your love, your voice, and your money (one great place is The Florence Project). These tools may feel meager in the face of so much injustice, but it’s what we have. Hold your child, give to legal aid, call your Congressperson, treat humans like humans. And do it every damn day.
To be connected directly with your Congressperson via the Fair Immigration Reform Movement, call 1-877-291-2172. To sign a petition, send a message of support to children, or find a local event, visit familiesbelongtogether.org.
About the Author
Sarah Curry is a writer, policy-advocate, and mom. Sometimes she’s funny. Sometimes she’s giving you a look. She recently was a finalist for the Francine Ringold Award for New Writers and the Center for Women Writers International Literary Award. You can read her short fiction in Nimrod. She’s worked as an immigrant rights researcher and advocate with organizations such as OneAmerica and We Belong Together. Visit her on Twitter @SarahManonCurry or sarahmanoncurry.