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This Motorized Pool Float Is for Die-Hard Water Lovers Only

We have a running joke in my family — that at any given time, we must have at least one more boat than members of our family. The same also applies to vehicles and homes and … we’re property hoarders, OKAY?

We’ve practically taken over the lake on which we vacation every weekend in the summer, for example. First, it was the cottage I grew up going to — a tiny bungalow the size of a two-car garage that didn’t even have running water until 1992. Once my brother and I married our spouses and started having our own kids, though, we ran out of room to all walk around in there, let alone sleep. So my parents purchased another tiny cottage on the same lake, and my husband and I followed suit shortly thereafter.

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I mean, it was either we give up roughing it on the water every summer or we move into our own little place. Let’s just say we love us some lake and campfire (and excuse to live in our bathing suits and forego showering for a couple days a week), so the only logical option was the latter.

If you’re going to have a place on a lake, though, you’ve got to have some water toys to go along with it, right? Between my parents, my brother, and me, we are the proud owners of 12 water toys, some motorized and some not. And that doesn’t include the floating water slide our neighbor lets us borrow or the floating tiki bar my dad is planning on building.

So when I saw this motorized water float, I was like WE MUST HAVE THAT IMMEDIATELY. Who wants to simply swim off the back of a boat when you can float off the back of the boat and CONTROL WHERE YOU GO?

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This float, officially called the Poolcandy Splash Runner Motorized Inflatable Swimming Pool Lounger (even the name is as extra as the product), has two hand controls to steer it around a full 360 degrees. According to the Amazon listing, the full specs include:

  • Heavy-Duty PVC Vinyl
  • Imported
  • Made from reinforced vinyl & plastic this pool float can hold up to 300lbs.
  • 30 Days Manufacturer’s Warranty by Poolcandy
  • Control this pool float with dual 66W motors with independent controls
  • Cruise effortlessly around the swimming pool or lake
  • Complete freedom of movement with 360 degrees of control
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A sure-fire way to level up your summer lounging game, this float has everything but a kitchen sink and is clearly for die-hard water lovers only.

Before you get too excited, though, you should know that it retails for $199.99, and listen. I may have a crap-ton of water toys, but most of mine are all heavily used, refurbished, or barely hanging on by a nut and bolt, so if anybody thinks I’m spending two hundo on a water floatie, they’ve got another think coming.

Still, it looks pretty fun. Maybe somebody on the lake will purchase one and let me give it a test drive. I’m die-hard, but I’m not made of money.

*googles how to make my own using driftwood and old video game controllers*

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