Nearly every summer weekend, my extended family heads up to my parents’ tiny cottage on the lake that my family has been going to for five generations. While there, we listen to the local classic rock radio station, the tagline of which is “the soundtrack of your lives.”

This afternoon as we were cleaning up and preparing to head back home, I overheard my husband and sister-in-law joking in the kitchen/living room (the only room, really) about what the soundtrack of parents’ lives would be if there were such a thing, and together, we decided that if someone were to create an album that encompasses the daily grind of parenting, this would be it.

The struggle is real.

Album Title: You Can’t Have Ice Cream Until You Finish That Hot Dog

Track 1: Whose cup is this?

Track 2: Why are you crying?

Track 3: Crumbs. They’re everywhere.

Track 4: Get out of my zone.

Track 5: What’s that smell?

Track 6: Poop, boogers, barf.

Track 7: Is it nap time yet?

Track 8: This room is still a mess.

Track 9: Poop or chocolate?

Track 10: Sleep, you bastards.

Track 11: Why is it sticky? All of it. WHY IS IT ALL ALWAYS STICKY?

Track 12: Oh, STAHP IT.

Track 13: You’re fine. Probably.

Track 14: HURRY UP.

Track 15: Chips you found under the public swing set aren’t for eating.

Track 16: No, you can’t play battleship in the toilet.

Track 17: You know what? Never mind. Battleship in the toilet sounds GREAT.

What’s on YOUR soundtrack?