By Melissa Janisin of goodnessmadness.com
Say I’ve had a hard day.
I mean, I’ve almost always had a hard day, and that’s the truth. Things just never go my way, or even when they do go my way – well, if you look hard enough, you can see that every silver lining has a gloomy, gray cloud. That’s like me. Always a cloud just waiting to dump all over me.
Which is exactly why I thank God every day for my Facebook friends. When I remember to be thankful at all, which is never, but, you know what I mean. If it weren’t for my friends on Facebook, I really don’t think I could go on.
Lots of times I think I can’t go on anyway. I just said so the other day in a status post, and do you know what? SO MANY people, like at least 9, came out to support me. “I’m always here for you,” they said, and, “Oh no, what’s wrong?” Of course I didn’t elaborate. I mean, I’m sure some of them truly want to be helpful, but the others are just out to know my business and probably use it against me somehow. It’s so obvious. They might not think I know it, but I do.
Like the other day, I posted an update saying, “Checked in to County Hospital,” in the middle of the night because, well, that’s what was going on with me. A whole bunch of people were like, “All okay?” and “Please call me,” but come on. I don’t want ALL my business all over the internet, do I?
No, thank you, I do not.
So I didn’t say anything else. I mean, when a person checks in to a hospital in the middle of the night, they are A LITTLE TOO BUSY to answer all your nosy questions. Mind your own business and I’ll mind mine.
Don’t get me wrong. My Facebook friends are sooooo important to me. When I’m down, the first people I turn to are my kindergarten friends from back in the day. I haven’t seen most of them in years. Decades, really. Never mind that – they’re still my rocks. I’m also pretty close with a few friends of friends whom I friended because I am sure I met them at some point, though I can’t recall specifics. Facebook is all about making connections.
Not that I’ll be friends with just anyone. Obviously some people are plain old toxic, and there’s not much we can do to change that.
Take for instance the so-called friend who had the nerve to suggest I just need a better outlook on life. “Get the attitude of gratitude!” she has said more than once. What does that even mean? I guess it’s easy to be grateful when you’re Little Miss Perfect like her, with her two perfect kids and her perfect husband. I mean, sure, he drinks a little. And her kids aren’t what you might call overachievers. Also, she’s pretty overweight, but so what? She doesn’t seem to care, so it’s not a real problem. Real problems are the ones that bother you. I’d like to see her “attitude of gratitude” if she had my problems. Ha! That would teach her about attitudes!
It’s not like my life is totally horrible. I mean, I have some good days.
Just last week I posted a photo of a rainbow I took right outside my kitchen window, and man! That sure made me feel hopeful. But of course nothing lasts. Why would it?
Not 24 hours later, someone was snippy with me at work, my husband didn’t seem interested in the dream I’d had, AND I was told that my new glasses wouldn’t be ready until Wednesday. They were supposed to be here Tuesday! SMH. Only me. Seriously, can’t I just get a break once in a while?
So, yeah. I do try to take the happy moments when I can, but when you have luck like mine, it’s hard.
Little Miss Perfect, she just doesn’t get it. “What you focus on grows,” she says. Right. I guess that’s why I can’t get my hair to stay straight no matter what I do. I’m not focused enough, right? Sure. Keep blaming the victim.
Anyway, all I’m here to say is, I’m so glad they came up with Facebook as a place for me to vent. Because sometimes, all you really need is a meaningless online chat with 16 or 17 of your closest acquaintances. Not that it helps. Obviously nothing helps. But at least people can see what I go through day in and day out.
To tell you the truth, I think I’d die if I had to keep it all to myself.
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