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Child Eats Dinner Without Incident, Mothers Pilgrimage to Sacred Home

By Heather Sadlemire

Albany, NY- Thousands of parents are now embarking on a pilgrimage to the Upstate NY home of a five-year-old girl who ate her dinner without any complaints on Tuesday evening.

The child’s mother, Lucille, said that the experience was other-worldly. “It started as your standard evening. My husband was running late. My daughter groaned when she was told to shut off YouTube, then crinkled her nose when I told her that dinner was Shake-N-Bake chicken with mashed potatoes and peas.

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“But when she sat at the table, I knew something was different. Right away, I could feel the energy shift in the air, ya know? She didn’t ask if she could watch a show on the iPad. And as dinner went on, things got stranger. She didn’t return her plate to the counter to have all the ‘spice’ removed from the chicken. She mentioned that the potatoes were adequately buttered. There were no yucky pieces set aside on a napkin or thrown on my own plate. There was no questioning how many bites were needed to satisfy me. She simply … ate.

“Before I knew it, her plate was cleared. And it wasn’t because she was secretly slipping the dog pieces of food under the table. She had consumed it! Everything! As I started live-streaming what I now know to be an historic event, she made the statement that has propelled other parents on their journey to our kitchen table. She said that her WHOLE belly was full, NOT just the dinner side.”

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As you know, children have two sections of their stomach: the Dinner Side and the Dessert Side. For centuries, scientists have believed that a child could ONLY fill up the Dinner Side when consuming their evening meal, stopping when an unspecified and ever-changing internal marker had been reached. Experts had previously prescribed to the notion that when a child declares themselves to be “full,” that is only in relation to the Dinner Side. It has been assumed that the Dessert Side remained empty and was now ready to be satiated with ice cream, leftover Easter candy or cookies that were purchased for school lunches.

There has never been a case of a child being “full” and not inquiring about a snack to immediately follow the meal they just didn’t eat. This discovery has left scientists perplexed as to why all children haven’t been finishing their meals without complaints.

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When questioned why she ate everything on her plate, the child answered with a shrug.

“There were just no problems tonight. It wasn’t too-gross of a dinner. We’ve had way worse, not-good things, like pot pie and lasagna. My belly was just extra hungry, I guess. Also, I got to do my own ketchup,” she said.

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About the Author

Heather Sadlemire is a marketing director and New York native (of the upstate variety) who covers the last few pages of a good book with her hands so that she doesn’t skim ahead and ruin the ending. In between scouring the clearance racks at Target and stalking Kristen Bell’s social feeds, she performs Disney numbers for her daughter (a preschooler who doesn’t object) and husband (who knew what he was getting into when he put a ring on it.) Follow her on Twitter and Instagram.