Is Charmin's new "Rollbot" a life savor, or is it just one more thing that mom ends up taking care of because no one else will.
Humor News/Trending Parenting

There’s Now a Toilet Paper Robot Because Moms Are Tired of Your Sh*t

Each year, technology wizards gather from far and wide to showcase their latest inventions at The Global Stage for Innovation (CES). This year, Charmin® unveiled a GoLab for the bathroom, focused on helping people “[e]njoy the Go, anytime, anywhere,” and OMG, shit just got real.

According to a press release issued by Business Wire, Charmin’s new self-balancing RollBot is one of three “never-before-seen conceptual prototypes made to deliver a better bathroom experience from start to flush.” 

Using Bluetooth technology, this remote control buttler connects to your smartphone to deliver a fresh roll of toilet paper in moments of despair. The only problem? RollBot has no hands, so you’ll need to keep it locked and loaded—and the door open—if you plan on being rescued anytime soon. 

Though the notion of having your own private steel-collar worker at home may sound enticing, owning technology of this magnitude means that, in addition to changing the roll of toilet paper in the bathroom, someone (mom) will now have to change one on a robot. Thanks, Charmin, you’re a real pal.

And as if modern potty servants weren’t enough, the company also introduced a futuristic version of the porta-potty: a premium porta-potty experience. Yep, you heard me right; V.I.Pee is a virtual reality EXPERIENCE for the loo, equipped with Oculus Rift S VR, so event and concert “GOers” never miss a beat. 

Photo Credit: Procter & Gamble

Hmmm… maybe let that digest a minute before reading about Charmin’s third big reveal.

SmellSense, an electronic monitoring system that mounts to the bathroom wall, allows you to “check how the bathroom smells” before stepping foot through the door. Okay, so maybe that’s not such a bad idea, but how does it work?

Photo Credit: Procter & Gamble

Calibrated to sniff out carbon dioxide or hydrogen sulfide found in ghastly aromas, SmellSense uses a “GO/NO GO” display to notify potential victims when it’s safe to go back inside and, honestly, this may be the best invention known to man.

Like it or not, toilet paper isn’t the only thing changing with technology. Rob Reinerman, Charmin Brand Director, says that by showcasing their relentless obsession with helping people “[e]njoy the Go now and into the future,” the company hopes to offer a better bathroom experience. If this is true, there’s no telling what the future holds.

Maybe in a few years, they’ll teach a robot how to fold a fitted sheet so mom can relax for real.