You guys have seen the post FYI (if you’re a teenage girl) circulating on Facebook, right? If not, go read it and the comments. Really. We’ll be here when you get back. So WOWZAS, huh? This writer is encouraging girls not to post sexually provocative pictures of themselves on social […]
Life
Signs You Went to Michigan State University at the Turn of the Century
Recently, Buzzfeed published a piece titled 23 Signs you Went to Michigan State University. I saw it countless times in my Facebook newsfeed as friends and family shared and reshared. But aside from a couple “Oh, huh. I guess I remember that” moments, neither Mr. Sammich nor I could relate […]
Stop With The Husband Bashing Already
I remember my brother telling my husband and me about a guy he works with teasing him before he married my sister-in-law. The guy asked him if he knew about the three rings: “First comes the engagement ring. Then comes the wedding ring. And then comes the suffering!” Hardy har har. […]
School Supply List: A Teacher’s Fantasy
I’ve seen a lot of posts on Facebook about school supply purchases my friends have or are about to make for their children entering elementary school, and I’ve gotta say, these lists are insane, you guys: 10 packages of dry erase markers, 17 boxes of crayons, top-of-the-line running shoes, four […]
32 Life Rules I’ve Learned in 32 Years
1. If you have a crap ton of diapers on hand, you won’t need them. If you don’t, your kid will shit the equivalent of an erupting volcano. 2. If something is due tomorrow, you can bet your ass your hard drive will crash/your printer will run out of ink/your […]
I can’t tell if my car wants me to play the trumpet or if there’s something wrong with my honker.
So as I was driving home this evening, one of the warning doohickeys on my car dashboard lit up and started dinging, indicating something was amiss. This normally wouldn’t be a big deal (I’ve been known to treat those things as suggestions rather than emergency alerts in the past), except […]
Today’s the Day I Ran Out of Give-a-Effs
It’s been a long time coming, but today officially marks the day I ran out of give-a-fucks. I’m not really sure what this means for me personally and professionally in the coming weeks. Let’s hope it doesn’t mean murder. Incident #1 I spent my fourth to last give-a-fuck this morning […]
Places I’d Rather Sleep Than The Cabin I Stayed In On Memorial Day
Each year on Memorial Day, my family travels to a state park where we rent a room at the inn or a cabin and then partake in things like cooking out, hiking, swimming, and generally enjoying nature. And in so doing, we expect to enjoy ourselves. I mean, we are spending […]