By Jill Morgenstern of Do Try This at Home Doctors in St. Louis have been successfully employing new methods to help treat parents and elves suffering from Chronic Elf Ennui Syndrome (CEES). The technique employs a combination of MRI scans along with antibiotics and various relaxation methods. First developed by doctors at Southeast University, the technique involves […]
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Guidelines For Living In Suburbia
By Kathryn Leehane of Foxy Wine Pocket Welcome to our suburban community! Life here is relaxing, enriching, and carefree. For maximum enjoyment, we have etched the following guidelines (in marble, actually). Please read them carefully. Your first offense will result in a $1,000 fine and public shaming. Multiple infractions will result in ejection from the neighborhood. […]
I Am Tolerant of All Parenting Styles But Also Think Yours Kinda Sucks But Still Think We Should Support Each Other
By Lola Lolita Look. I know there are, like, zillions of parenting methods out there, and that’s fine. Parenting is hard. Beyond hard, actually. Each person has to do what’s right for her family. And we should all support one another. If you want to bottle feed or have to for medical reasons or whatever, […]
Donald Trump Speaks About Charities Guaranteed to Make America Great Again
By Joe Medler of Developing Dad There’s a lot of misinformation being spread by losers about me. It’s like people think that because they say something that makes it true. Things like, “He’s a bigot” or “He’s sexist’ or “He’s unaware of the issues facing America.” These could not be further from the truth. […]
Brave Mother Goes Viral For Calling Out Bottle Feeding Shamers
By Liv of livebysurprise.com Mary Ann Classon thinks of herself as a mamma warrior. The 42-year-old mother of five from California recently took a stand at a Sacramento restaurant to empower other bottle feeding moms. Her daughter was hungry, she says, and she had the nerve to feed her in public. As she unsheathed the nipple of […]
Toddler Has Need That is Not Life Threateningly Urgent
By Jill Morgenstern of Do Try This At Home Toddler Isabel Sutton stunned her family friends and neighbors late Tuesday afternoon by issuing a request that she did not deem life threateningly urgent. The demand for juice and crackers came at 4:36 p.m. at only 64 decibels and was totally devoid of her habitual hysteria. Her […]
Press Release: Amazon Wins Bid to Take Over Christmas from North Pole
By Liv of livebysurprise.com December 1 – The North Pole confirmed today that Santa Claus is retiring. The North Pole facilities will start closing down effective January 1st. Starting next Christmas, all deliveries will be outsourced. The closure is the result of a combination of issues: The North Pole Can’t Compete with Amazon Santa and the reindeer […]
Local Elementary School Declares War on Christmas
By Karen Johnson of The 21st Century SAHM Well, friends, it’s happening. We’ve barely had time to recover from RedCupGate, and now this news has befallen us. You’ve probably heard of the sacrilegious “War on Christmas” that is plaguing our good Christian society. Well, Apple Wood Valley Elementary School has done just that. This school […]