Should you feel guilty or wrong for drinking in front of your kids? You mean those little people who drive you to drink? Ha! Hell no. Pour one for me too.
Humor Parenting

Advice: Drinking In Front of Your Kids

Should you feel guilty or wrong for drinking in front of your kids? You mean those little people who drive you to drink? Ha! Hell no. Pour one for me too.

By Keenan McGrath of Dear Queenan

Dear Queenan,

We were out at dinner with our kids and ran into another family from the kids’ school. The mother was really friendly until she noticed our glasses of wine and then started acting uncomfortable. It made me feel like I was doing something wrong. Is it acceptable to have a drink in front of your kids?


Feeling Like A Lush


Dear Lush,

My feelings on this subject are 100% clear and defined: my children are the reason I drink; therefore, I can drink in front of my children. In fact, my box ‘o wine may be the reason we’re all still alive today.

I don’t judge people with kids who drink; I judge people with kids who don’t. How do those people survive their children? Do you beat them? Do you pop pills? Do you live with stress, rage and resentment for 20 years that leaves you a hollow shell of your former self? None of these seems like a good option to me when I can just pour myself a chalice-full of red blend and drown out the sounds of their voices with the sigh of contentment echoing in my head.

It’s like I always tell my kids, “When you start whining, Mommy starts wining.”

Even before they can talk, and therefore whine, the day stretches out so long in front of parents that without the effervescent light at the end of the tunnel, we may not make it through the day. Back when Amazing Grace was a baby, I paid $50 for the cup holder attachment to my overpriced stroller for the specific purpose of carrying mimosas around while I strolled her endlessly through Central Park. I figured it was enough of a shock to my system that I had to give up sleeping in, going out with friends, or having brunch on a Saturday. If I’d taken away my mimosas, I truly might have compromised my organ function.

I am in no way advocating getting truly drunk in front of your little ones. Save your spring break behavior for weddings and work trips. Just recently I did a lyrical interpretive dance in a dive bar that ended in a full split on the nasty floor while wearing a sundress. These things happen. Sweetpotato was kind enough to video the performance and play it for my mother, who looked at me aghast and said, “But you have children!”  And I said, and this is really key, “But they weren’t with me!”

Regardless, you have you a glass of wine any time you want and just know that those of us living in glass bottles can’t feel the stones.


Dear Queenan

This post was originally published on Dear Queenan.


About the Author

Keenan (and her alter-ego Queenan) resides in Charlotte, North Carolina, where she has built a lifestyle around drinking, judging and just being fabulous. Her goal is to help others attain that same state of balance by giving advice on these and other topics on her blog Dear Queenan. The rest of her time is devoted to sharing inspired moments of wit, wisdom, and folks being a hot mess on Instagram and Facebook. Keenan also raises two kids, a husband and a dog when she can’t find appropriate sitters.