My arm looks huge. There's a fully stocked bar behind us. My eyes are puffy from the exhaustion of motherhood. There are so many reasons to delete this photo. But there are far more reasons to keep it.
Life Parenting

9 Terrible Reasons I Deleted This Bad Photo

My arm looks huge. There's a fully stocked bar behind us. My eyes are puffy from the exhaustion of motherhood. There are so many reasons to delete this photo. But there are far more reasons to keep it.

By Stephanie Pappas of snackdinner

I’m not a frequent sharer of personal photos on my site snackdinner. But I am sharing this photo for all the reasons I deleted it.

  • My arm looks huge.
  • The camera is shooting up my nose.
  • My chin is hinting at doubling.
  • My eyes are tired and puffy after dealing with the child whose tantrum dashed my restaurant birthday dinner.
  • Kiddo’s eyes are equally tired and puffy from throwing said tantrum.
  • He is wearing reindeer pajamas in September.
  • The reindeer pants don’t match his eyeglasses shirt.
  • While the awesome cupcakes are in focus, we are not.
  • The even blurrier bar behind us is at clearly kid-inappropriate height.

I rescued this picture because I am in it.

Keeping this photo is not a matter of getting Mom in the picture (I’m all over the photo stream from the day), nor is it an attempt to be less self-critical of myself or my parenting. There are other, much nicer photos of the day taken at much more flattering angles, but in general, I felt confident about myself and how I looked that day. I had time to not only shower, but dry my hair, apply mascara, and put on jewelry. Other people were there to help me with the kiddo, so I could squeak in one more wearing of my towering espadrilles before the end of the season.

I rescued this photo because of what it celebrates.

Unlike the perfectly posed photos from earlier in the day, when our faces were brighter and our clothes color-coordinated, this photo celebrates our day-to-day lives. It celebrates my son and his adorable, power-clashing sartorial choices. It celebrates my husband’s and my hard work to maintain some adult spaces in our toddler-run home. It celebrates my long-practiced patience at hitting the reset button on a disastrous day. Most importantly, it celebrates me.

It is my birthday. Those are my new gorgeous earrings. Those are my delicious cupcakes atop my beautiful cake stand that too often sits on a high shelf. That is my laugh in response to my two-year-old saying, “What’s in the box?” in Pitt-perfect pitch. Those are my extra plates for my extra people, the loved ones who came to share the day–and the bar-of-inappropriate-kid-height–with me.

It’s easy to remember to celebrate our child’s milestones. It’s easy to buy color-coordinated outfits for the whole family (if not easy to get everyone to wear them). But in these early parenting years where it’s hard to remember to shower, we often forget to celebrate ourselves.

Over the next few months, I’m making a conscious effort to celebrate me more: to reward myself for inching progress on my writing, to knit a few inches for myself instead of my family, to finally use the grown-up bathtub in my grown-up bathroom.

I hope you’ll take up this challenge, too. Leave a note in the comments to show us how you’ll celebrate yourself.

This post was originally published on snackdinner.

Related post from Stephanie Pappas: Ways to “Get Mom in the Picture”

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About the Author

Stephanie Loomis Pappas is a professor turned stay-at-home parent committed to debunking all of the bad parenting advice on the internet. She started snackdinner.com to remind Googling parents that whatever they’re doing, they’re doing just fine. You can find snackdinner on facebook @snackdinner and instagram @trysnackdinner.