Remember in the days of yore when we had to like get up and change the radio? Or physically write down a grocery list? Or make (and keep) mental notes so we didn’t forget shit like picking up our kids and changing over the laundry? Rough world, that was.
A few years ago we got Siri and no longer had to actually Google the answers to life’s big questions, like “How do I get slime out of the carpet?” and “What is the guy actually saying in that song ‘Blinded by the Light'”? We thought that was cool. But then the tech-gods sent us Alexa. And our worlds were changed forever.
Even though we’re sad for the post-it note industry that has suffered since we don’t need to jot down reminders anymore, we are grateful for our new bestie. Except when she listens to our kids and changes our music from Adele to Kidz Bop. And when our spouses talk to her more than us. And when our kids add five PS4 games to our Amazon lists. But other than that, super grateful.
If you’re an Alexa house (or even if you’re not because the thought of your three-year-old having control over the appliances and your contact list is terrifying), you can probably relate to these tweets about the good, the bad, and the ugly that this newest form of technology brings into our homes.
Alexa, tell me when I’ll experience my next mood swing.
— Mama Babbles… (@mama_babble) February 9, 2018
Told my kids to play outside and they thought it was a band. Heard one of them ask Alexa to play songs by Outside.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) January 13, 2018
Alexa, feed my kids.
— MotherPlaylist (@MotherPlaylist) January 2, 2018
I don’t have Alexa.
I wouldn’t know what to do if someone in my house actually listened to me
— OutnumberedMother (@OutNumbMother) November 28, 2018
My sister bought us a Google Home Mini and my husband has already said more to it in 8 hours than he’s said to me in 11 years.
— Lauren Mullen (@DraggingFeeties) December 26, 2017
Did you ask your Aunties Siri and Alexa?
– Me whenever my son asks a question
— Mommy Cusses (@mommy_cusses) March 14, 2018
Me: NO MORE CHRISTMAS MUSIC!
4: Alexa, Play Easter music.
— Janina Maria (@dontlosethekids) January 13, 2018
Alexa, turn up the volume whenever my kids start chewing next to me.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) November 2, 2018
Thanks anyway Alexa, but I have kids, so I don’t need anyone else listening in on all of my conversations.
— the Mom TruthBomb (@momTruthBomb) December 12, 2018
*A day without the kids*
“Hmm, something’s missing. Alexa, scream for the next three hours.”
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) April 12, 2018
Alexa does this look infec-
Alexa: PLEASE STOP ASKING ME THINGS
— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) November 25, 2018
Thanks, Alexa, I DID want to teach my kids that shouting commands in rapid succession is the way to get whatever they want in this world.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) December 31, 2016
Alexa, disregard my kids every time they try to change the song I just asked you to play.
— Molly England (@bluebonetbabies) September 13, 2018
When your 8yo daughter asks Alexa if Santa’s real and Alexa pulls through. pic.twitter.com/Cw0oKFiepV
— Molly England (@bluebonetbabies) June 9, 2018
Everyone in my house is like, “Alexa, make dinner,” “Alexa, fold these clothes,” “Alexa, why is the sky blue,” and I’m just like, for the last time, my name is not Alexa.
— The Mom at Law (@TheMomAtLaw) December 11, 2018
My toddler asks so many questions that even Alexa has taken up drinking.
— A Bearer Of Dad News (@HomeWithPeanut) September 15, 2017
Hopefully Alexa will be able to feed our kids and predict our mood swings soon. But I guess, for now, we’ll have to just appreciate her helping our kids with their homework, reminding us to put the clothes in the dryer, and doing our Christmas shopping so we don’t have to people out in the world.
Also, to all the people who were named Alexa before this invention took over our homes, we’re sorry. Sincerely, the world.