By Amber Leventry My daughter just came home from a friend’s birthday party ready to star in a production of Cats, apparently. I don’t blame the party hosts. I blame the individuals who are capitalizing on a kid’s love of face paint. Summer jamborees, fall festivals, winter carnivals—you know, kid-friendly […]
Humor
15 Ways To Piss Off A Toddler
By Cassie Hilt of The Chronicles of Motherhood If you have dealt with a toddler before, you know they can be fun and quirky little people. And by ‘fun’ and ‘quirky,’ I mean unpredictable little a-holes. Don’t get me wrong, they’re cute and everything, but don’t let them fool you. […]
Pure Barre or Pure Hell: 5 Things You Learn About Yourself After a Month of Barre
By Julie Walthers of Ghost Editorial For Hanukkah/Christmas (or what I cleverly refer to as Chronikkah), my husband was thoughtful enough to buy me a monthly membership to Pure Barre. I have a love/hate relationship with these boutique workout classes. They are outrageously overpriced, promote a cult-like following, and generally […]
A Letter to My Self-Esteem on the Day My Pee-Proof Undies Came in the Mail
By Shelby Spear of shelbyspear.com Dear Self-Esteem, I know. I hear your soul crying. You’re only 46 and owning a pair of pee-proof underwear is outrageous and humiliating. But try not to let the gravity of this day weigh you down. God knows most of your physical self has already lost […]
Momma Told Me There’d Be Boobs Like This
By Jaycee Kemp of Running Through Water I own 37 bras in 12 sizes. It’s complicated. I’ve grown weary of complicated. I’m 47. When I was a little girl, I sat at my grandmother’s kitchen table and watched her float through the kitchen, preparing the foods that ultimately shaped memories […]
18 Tweets About Being Married with Kids That Will Crack You Up
By Joanna McClanahan of Ramblin’ Mama First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby and the endless tweet material. Being married with kids means you probably don’t know what day it is, but you’re sure you’re the only person who ever bothers to refill the filtered water. It means “getting […]
Gwyneth Paltrow Recommends Yoni Eggs, Inspires Unofficial Guide To A Blessed Vagina
In 2015, the well-known actress, Gwyneth Paltrow, sparked quite a bit of intrigue, and probably some eye rolls and a sudden spike in women visiting the ER with burnt vaggies, after raving about the practice of steam-cleaning her vagina. A thing that used to be reserved for dusty old rugs. […]
Shame Hat: Why I Wiped My A** with the City of Chicago
By Kara Martinez Bachman of karamartinezbachman.com I once wiped my ass with a souvenir hat from the city of Chicago. It was a lovely hat. It was white and featured colorful line drawings of landmarks. The Sears Tower was on the front. Around the sides were the skyline, and some […]